The Story of the Kuln-Drivers 1

I decided to publish this one early.

Clanking through the woods,
Shackled to a rusty chain,
Came the prisoners.

Little did they know,
That they were followed closely,
By a shady wraith.

Jeffry had no food,
He had had none for too long,
He was desperate.

He approached the slaves,
A kind one tried to shoo him.
But he would not flee.

Jeffrey was captured
By the evil Kuln-Drivers.
He too marched along.

Next: The Story of the Kuln-Drivers 2

The Greatest Sacrifice

My Friday posts will be in yellow.

On a space rocket,
A brave monkey soars away!
Never to return.

Rocket Monkey

I'm gonna get you
You think I'm cute, innocent
Watch your back, human!

Blast Off!

Monkey and rocket
look like best friends forever -
3, 2, 1, Blast Off!

I love my rocket
it is such an awesome toy
take our picture, please.

How can anyone
not love a cute li'l monkey
holding a rocket?

Perfect manicure
on those long monkey fingers
Ooh! Check out her toes!

Picture Perfect FRIDAY

Okay, the consensus at the Horrible household this morning was that we should have another picture today, since we'll have a movie on Monday. So this morning, with props to haikurumba, the picture is <echoing voice> Monkeys... In... Space!!!!<end echoing voice>
I'm sure this will inspire some truly terrible poetry - so hop to it!

P.S. Haikurumba, the link you'd given me before worked when I got it, but it didn't work any more. So I had to find another space monkey for our inspiration. Sorry!

Inspired by Tomboy

My car smells like fart
Tomboy is the guilty one
I think I'll stay home

Fuzzy Bubble

And here's my happy one:

Fuzzy bubble floats,
Alighting on wind, and soars.
Flying with the clouds...

The Death of a Bubble

Sorry this is late. Here is my...sad...bubble story.

Majestic Bubble,
Floating, dancing in the air,
The wind makes your path.

Your path dances on:
Over hill and across stream,
Alighting on leaf.

Oh No! Here comes Man...
With his machines and "progress"...
He smashes the leaf.

Onward goes Bubble,
Followed by Man's destruction.
There is no safety.

Now bubble is trapped,
Surounded by Man's machines.
Nature overcome.

Inspiration

Okay, I know this isn't one of our regular game days, but I just had to share this, erm, inspiring game with you, for your Horrible Haiku efforts. If you peruse the comments, you'll see that several of the regular readers have already taken inspiration from the game.
Inscrutable Flatulence Game of the Week So Far

Follow the link to the game, and then click on the yellow block that looks like a game controller. Make sure the dog is nearby, because the sound is pretty loud, and noises will, um, emit from your computer. And thank God that the technology for "smell cards" has not yet been developed.

Here's my initial offering:

Beans, musical fruit:
Deadly silent offensives
Wow - sneaked that one by.

Two minutes now lost
I can't believe I played it
Now you get to try.

Hi

Walking down the street
Delia sees a doggie
"hi hi hi hi hi"

Bubble bath

Bubbly bubbly bath
makes the little girl giggle
splish splash happy bath

An idea...

Hey y'all - judging from the movie-inspired haiku we already have, and some that I know are under consideration - would you like to move Picture Monday to Picture Friday, and have Movie Monday in its place?

If so, what movies would you like to honor in horrible verse? You can put suggestions in the comments.

More bubbles

Sitting in the shade
blowing bubbles with my kids
lazy Saturday

Wait for the issue
to bubble up to the top
before resolving

Bubbling water
marinara simmering
while my pasta boils

Bubbles in the tub
remind me of E. Murphy
don't fart in the bath

Rant

My professor stinks
She hates when we ask questions
How else does one learn?

More airport security

Riffing off of Haikurumba's poem...

The Freedom Baggie:
"Kip Hawley's an idiot"
Now they pat me down.

Bubble

Bubble, toil, trouble -
I like to sow discontent
and make people think.

Weird and Wacky Word Wednesday!

Okay, horribilists, here is the word for today...

BUBBLE

The rule for Weird and Wacky Word Wednesday is that the first haiku you post today must use this word (or some form of it, like bubbles or bubbling or bubbled), but you don't have to include the word in every piece you post.

Have fun and be funny!

Airport security

Throw out your water
remove shoes, empty pockets
Thank you, TSA

Going IPO

Going IPO
Lots of work to prepare now
I want stock options.

All hands telecon
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
OMG - boring!

You should visit...

Satan lives in Hell
He must be such a hothead
you should visit him.

Scary Frog

AAAAhhhh! He is scary
his red eyes see everything
I hope he won't kill.

The Death of Mr. Frog

My Monday Posts Will Be In Red.
My Wednesday Posts Will Be In Green.

With his great, red eyes,
And his giant orange feet,
Mr. Frog is dead.

He had loneliness,
Even in his prime of life,
A child's role-model.

A good life he had,
But to strong fortress he went,
And died a sad death.

King of many frogs,
Yet alone in life and death,
His sadness quite great.

And now Frog is dead,
And we did not know him well,
Much to our great woe.

Frogs Rule

Clinging to my leaf
Scoping for some tasty bugs
With my beady eyes

Sitting still, then... SPROING!!!
I hop to another tree
I look like a toy

Uncover the grill
Eew! Something is on my leg!
Tree frog hops away.

Inside the back door
Outlined frog is on the frame
RIP, Frog Fred

Picture Perfect Monday!

Hey there Haiku artists - here's the picture for Monday, February 26 - let's have some fun!

Red-eyed Tree Frog at duiops.net

Hiccups

Hic hic hic hiccup
Diaphragm contracting in
painful spasms. Ouch!

Roadkill

A pungent odor
wafts in through the car window
Dead skunk in the road

All over the floor

All over the floor
Grapes, beans, peas, and cracker bits
The waiter hates us

A note from the (benevolent) dictator

Hey y'all - to help keep those creative (and silly) juices flowing, I have plans for two weekly games.

On Picture Monday, I'll post a picture or a link to a picture, for use as a starting point for our horrible haiku.

On Word Wednesday, I'll post a single word. The rule on Word Wednesday is that you don't have to include the Magic Word in every haiku you post, but you must include it in the first haiku you post.

I've got a collection of pictures and words to start with, but if you have suggestions, please email them to me (hedwyg AT gmail DOT com), and I'll get them into the list.

If you do not own the copyright to a picture you want me to use, then please include the link to where you found it. For any pictures that we don't own, I'll post only a link to the picture, and not the picture itself (unless I have obtained permission from the owner).

Rodents of unusual size

R.O.U.S.s?
I don’t think they exist. Errrrrrrrrrhh.
I guess he was wrong.

Imitation is the finest form of flattery?

The baby watches
as her daddy wipes his bum
Then she “wipes” her own

Fezzik and Vizzini

You had to know it was coming, right?

"No more rhyming now,
I mean it!" "Anybody
want a peanut?" "DOH!"

The Sorry Story...

This will be a five part series about Jeffrey. We are now in Chapter 1: Jeffrey's Great Anger. The haikus will be in white, and announcements will be in blue. (Each Story will be five haikus in length).

This is the story,

A sorry, sorry story
That I will now tell:

Once, in a village
There was a man named Jeffrey,
Jeffrey was ugly.

People were mean to
him, even when he was nice.
Jeffrey was angry!

They threw stones at him,
and he ran as far as he
could possibly go.

He took refuge in
the great big forest of Kuln.
There he was alone.

Next: The Story of the Kuln-Drivers.
P. S. Is plural Haiku or Haikus?

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday, sis!
Haikurumba rocks the blog
Hope it's a great day.

Low Flow

Low flow toilets stink
If at first they don't succeed,
Flush, then flush again.

Romance

Roses are... pinkish
Violets are... violet
Romance escapes me.

Who let the dogs out?

Who let the dogs out?
Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof
The neighbors hate us.

Blame the dog

This room smells like butt
protesting my innocence -
the dog is gassy.

Exercise Wheel

What could that smell be?
Poop in the exercise wheel
squished by running feet